


problems and solutions

by BestDeadFriendsForever



Series: Accidents Happen [3]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Bobby and Athena are Buck's parents you can't change my mind, Bobby is Buck's Dad, Bobby is Everyone's Dad, Eddie has anxiety, I'm trans so Buck is too because I said so, M/M, Protective Bobby Nash, Protective Eddie Diaz, Step-Dad Evan "Buck" Buckley, Trans Evan "Buck" Buckley, Trans Male Character, Trans Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24086377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BestDeadFriendsForever/pseuds/BestDeadFriendsForever
Summary: “Our job is dangerous and unpredictable. Every day we ride out on that truck with no idea how things are going to go down.” Eddie turned his head to look at Buck. “I love you, and I know that you love your job. I don’t want you to quit. It’s a huge part of you and I get that. I just want you and this baby,” Eddie said and turned onto his side so he could tenderly brush his thumb over Buck’s middle, “to be okay. And I’m scared that you’re not going to be.”
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: Accidents Happen [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1713259
Comments: 18
Kudos: 344





	problems and solutions

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Eddie has an anxiety attack in this fic so be wary as you read this installment

Eddie tried not to be nervous. There was nothing really to be nervous about. It was just a normal doctor’s visit, but for Eddie it was the first one he’d been able to come with Buck to- though it was only the second that Buck had had at all- and he felt his usual over-thinking anxiety buzzing in the back of his mind as well as a defensiveness for Buck as they walked into the office. Buck seemed completely at ease as he greeted the sunny receptionist by name- Emma- and they chatted for a bit before Emma handed over a clipboard of paperwork.

Buck sat down with his bad leg stretched out in front of him, Eddie knew that it had been bothering him more often since the pain in his hip hadn’t eased up or gone away yet, and Eddie rested his arm on the back of Buck’s chair in a silent gesture of support. Buck scribbled down answers to the forms in his lap dutifully and Eddie couldn’t help but quirk a small smile. He’d never seen Buck so diligent about his health before- Buck had a bad habit of making sure to take care of everyone else and forgetting to take care of himself. A trait that they shared.

Buck stood and walked the clipboard back to the receptionist’s desk and it gave Eddie a moment to look around the waiting room. It was pretty nice with its soft orange walls and complimentary paintings. It was fairly empty of people. There was a teenage girl and- presumably- her mother as well as a woman who seemed almost ready to deliver. The pregnant woman was idly reading a magazine, so Eddie’s attention moved quickly away so it didn’t seem like he was staring. The mother of the teenager seemed to be watching Buck suspiciously and Eddie felt himself tense, his shoulders squaring as if for a fight, but after a moment the girl showed her mother something on her phone and Buck was back in his chair beside Eddie. The girl looked up at the two of them and gave Eddie a soft, almost knowing, smile before keeping up her quiet conversation with her mother.

“Making friends already?” Buck teased and gave Eddie a look. Eddie rolled his eyes and shifted in his seat, letting his arm fall around Buck’s shoulders. “Relax, Eds. It’s fine,” Buck said softly, brushing a soft kiss to the corner of Eddie’s mouth. Eddie just nodded jerkily, still stiff and tense.

The teenager was called back, and Eddie managed to relax a little without the narrow eyed looks the mother had been unsubtly sending the two of them. Eddie pulled out his phone to send a quick text to Carla asking for an update on Christopher since the boy had been rather put-out that he couldn’t come to the doctors- which was two hours after school started- when a nurse in soft pink and yellow scrubs came out and called Buck’s name. “Evan Buckley?”

“Right here,” Buck said and stood up a little stiffly. Eddie stood and put a hand to the small of Buck’s back- just in case- as the nurse nodded with an easy smile and gestured over her shoulder.

“Alright, if you’ll come back with me.” She turned on her heel and they walked down a short hallway to an exam room. Buck moved to sit on the table and Eddie sat down in the chair to the side, though he wanted to hover a little around Buck as ridiculous as it sounded even just in his own head. “We’re going to do some bloodwork. It’s pretty routine,” she explained as she moved to a cabinet to pull out the supplies. “Just checking to make sure your vitamin levels are where they should be and that everything else in your blood is normal.” Buck just nodded and held out his arm. He only grimaced as she tied the band around his arm. “If you get woozy at the sight of blood, we can lay you down before we try this.”

“I’m a firefighter, blood doesn’t really bother me all that much,” Buck assured her, and she nodded easily. “Have many fainters?”

“A fair few actually,” she said as she gently prodded at Buck’s arm to find a vein. “Though sometimes it’s the partners instead of the carriers.” She shot Eddie a grin.

“He’s a firefighter too, so I think he can handle it,” Buck teased and stuck his tongue out at Eddie. He sucked in a breath and looked back to where the nurse had been holding his arm, she’d stuck him with the needle while he wasn’t looking. “Ow,” Buck said pointedly but the nurse only levelled him with a look. Eddie cracked a small smile at that.

“There we go.” She put a bandage on Buck’s arm before pulling off the band and tossing everything into the biohazard box. “I’m going to go and bring this to the lab. You- Mr. Buckley- need to go give a urine sample. You know the routine.” Buck nodded in affirmation. “Your partner can wait here.”

“Thank you,” Buck said and stood. She was gone and Buck looked over at Eddie. “You going to be alright for minute?”

Eddie rolled his eyes. “Yes. Now go.” He gave Buck a light swat on the thigh and Buck just grinned back at him. After a little while of Buck being gone, Eddie’s phone vibrated with a reply from Carla and he felt a small smile tugging at his mouth. Carla had told him that Christopher was doing better than the near tantrum from that morning, and she’d sent a picture of him working on the miniature lab that his science class had been leading up to. Chris hadn’t been able to talk about anything else.

“Seems like somebody has perked up from this morning,” Buck said, and Eddie turned to grin at him from where Buck was shuffling back into the room.

“Well, he’s never been particularly good at holding a grudge,” Eddie pointed out as he locked his phone and slipped it back into his pocket. He wanted to be attentive to Buck and to the doctor when the doctor came in.

…..

Eddie hadn’t exactly been sure what to expect from Buck’s OB, but the tiny woman who bounced into the room certainly wasn’t it. “Good afternoon, Mr. Buckley,” she said, drawing out the good with an enthusiastic chirp. She sat in the little wheeled stool and flipped open Buck’s chart with a flourish. She glanced up and looked at Eddie. “This must be your partner- is it also Mr. Buckley or are we gonna make this easy on me, Mister…?”

“Diaz,” Eddie said and gave her a slightly confused smile. “But just Eddie is fine.”

“Alright Just Eddie Diaz, I’m Dr. Holly Carter,” she said and sent Eddie a wink. “Alright, professional time.” She sobered up and levelled a thoughtful stare at Buck. “Before we get into the results and all the entanglements that come with that, how are you feeling?”

Buck just shrugged to give himself time to think. “I’m okay. A few aches and pains here and there, but that’s to be expected.”

She nodded thoughtfully. “Right, but with your history of blood clots we don’t want to pass off too much as nothing.” She flicked her curly blonde hair out of her eyes as she looked down at Buck’s chart. “Your bloodwork looks pretty good, though there’s a slight dip in your iron levels. Nothing too alarming yet since I’m sure you’ve not changed too much about your diet, but it’s a concern.” She folded her hands in her lap and looked at Buck seriously. “Anemia can be very common in pregnancies where trans men are the carriers. It’s not necessarily always dangerous, but given your job and the potential for severity, it could become an issue.”

Eddie felt his chest clench hard, his heart feeling like it was trying to escape his rib cage. But Buck seemed perfectly calm as he nodded. Eddie swallowed thickly and spoke up. “What can we do to fix it?”

Dr. Carter smiled at him reassuringly, though Eddie’s heart was having a hard time getting with the program. “I can provide you a list of foods that are high in iron as well as some over-the-counter supplements that are safe. Though I’d change the diet first and see where we’re at with the next work-up before we go too crazy. Too much iron in Buck’s blood won’t be good either.” Buck nodded and grinned.

She talked more about Buck’s bloodwork but a lot of it Eddie didn’t quite understand, but Buck was nodding along and asking questions with a thoughtful expression on his face. Eddie suddenly felt woefully unprepared. “Alright, are there any questions that we didn’t cover?”

“No-” Buck started to say but Eddie knew the other was going to try and weasel out of asking the question that Bobby was getting antsy to know the answer to.

“When should Buck stop working?” Eddie asked, ignoring Buck’s disgruntled expression.

Dr. Carter’s face twisted up as she clearly debated over the answer. “I would say, and I wouldn’t be an expert on firefighting so this is a rough guestimate, that Buck should be able to work until about month four or five. We tell most people that they can continue working and doing whatever it was they were doing pre-pregnancy, like running and working out, up until they’re due. But,” she said as Buck turned to shoot Eddie an ‘I told you so’ look, “most people aren’t running into burning buildings and lifting grown people out of dangerous situations. I’d say once Buck starts to show- and I don’t mean that cute little bump that people post on Instagram, I mean _really_ show- then he’ll need to slow down a little.” Buck seemed upset with the answer, but Eddie just nodded as Buck pouted. “Anything else I can answer for you today?”

“No, thank you,” Buck said and gave her a strained version of his normal grin. “I think that’s just about everything.”

She clapped her hands together as she stood and tucked Buck’s chart under her arm. “Amazing. So, let’s let you get out of here then. If there’s anything else that you think of, don’t hesitate to call. And if any of that pain you’re having shifts or gets worse, go to the hospital. Immediately,” she said sternly.

Buck and Eddie nodded, and they walked out to the receptionist’s desk so Buck could make another appointment. Buck tucked the appointment card into his wallet and Eddie wrapped an arm around his shoulders as they left.

The car ride was quiet as Eddie drove the truck back to the house since both of them had a later shift time to accommodate the appointment. Eddie could feel the displeasure rolling off of Buck in waves. “Buck-”

“Just… not right now, Eddie. I love you, but I’m mad and I just need to be mad,” Buck said sharply. Eddie tried not to take it as a jab at him, because Buck didn’t say he was mad at _Eddie_. Eddie just nodded and tried to shove his anxiety down.

…..

Buck had settled and they’d talked as they’d shoved their work things into their respective bags at the house and then gotten into Buck’s Jeep to head into the station. But then Bobby had been waiting for them and asked about what the doctor had said and what little good-will Eddie had built back up seemed to disappear as Buck just clenched his jaw and stalked into the locker room.

Bobby turned to Eddie with a raised eyebrow. “The doctor said that once Buck was really showing in a couple of months that he needed to slow down.” Bobby nodded and Eddie raked a hand through his hair. “Obviously, he’s not thrilled.”

Bobby nodded and he glanced over his shoulder with a heavy sigh. “We’ll figure something out. I don’t want him feeling like we’re leaving him behind.”

Eddie nodded. “Just… maybe don’t bring it up today. Give him some time and space to cool off.” Eddie rubbed the back of his neck. Bobby clapped his hand onto Eddie’s shoulder before letting Eddie go into the locker room to change into his uniform.

…..

Buck was scrolling through some research about maternity- despite _hating_ the word being applied to his situation immensely- leave for the LAFD. He was also looking for any precedent about what his options were about continuing with his job the later in his pregnancy he got.

“Hey,” Eddie said and brushed a kiss to the top of Buck’s head. Usually when Buck was in full research mode, he left him alone because it was just Buck’s way of coping with whatever was going on in his head. But he felt like they needed to talk about what had happened- what needed to happen.

“Hey,” Buck said distractedly, his eyes never leaving his laptop screen.

“Babe, can we talk for a second?” Eddie asked and leaned his hip against the table. Buck looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. “I know you’re not happy-”

“Eddie, I don’t want this to turn into a fight,” Buck cut in and shook his head.

“Neither do I,” Eddie said firmly. “But I know that you’re upset and now you’re trying to figure it out on your own. But you don’t have to. I’m right here, and I want to help.” Buck glanced at his lap guiltily. “Listen,” Eddie said quietly and bumped Buck’s foot with his own. “I get that this is your way of wrapping your head around all of this,” Eddie said softly and sent Buck a small smile when the other looked up at him again. “I just want you to talk to _me_ too.”

Buck nodded and closed the laptop before pushing it away. “I don’t want to leave work,” Buck said bluntly and shook his head a little. “It’s just too much like last time and I don’t want to feel like that again.” Eddie just nodded. Both of them had talked about how isolated Buck had felt after his accident and then the embolism.

Eddie didn’t know how to say what he wanted to say. He was paralyzed by the fear that something was going to happen to Buck and the baby while they were on the job because Buck refused to slow down, and Eddie wasn’t going to be able to do anything to help them. It turned his stomach and made him feel like he was drowning.

“It won’t be,” Eddie said ineffectually and gave Buck as reassuring a smile as he could manage with the taste of bile in the back of his throat. Thankfully their conversation was cut off by Christopher coming in with his homework and frowning at the two of them. “What’s up, Superman?” Eddie asked and crossed his arms out of habit.

“I need some help. Can Buck help me?” Christopher asked and seemed to pick up on some of the tension in the room as he glanced between both his parents.

“Yeah,” Buck said and gave Christopher a bright smile. He went to tug out a chair for Chris to sit in, but Christopher just crawled into Buck’s lap and spread out his worksheet. Buck glanced it over and then he started going over it with Christopher. Eddie smiled a little as he watched them, and it helped him to take a deep breath and relax.

It wasn’t until he was in bed that night, Buck completely dead asleep, that his anxiety started to tug at the back of his mind. He kept replaying some of the worse moments of seeing Buck in pain or hurt.

_There was so much blood and the red light from the truck wasn’t helping any as Eddie clung to Buck’s hand and prayed furiously for a miracle. That the city would be quick and they’d have another truck to help move this one, that they would have the man-power to move the truck on their own, that something- **anything** \- would happen to keep Buck from dying right in front of him. He was trying to stay calm, but even Hen’s hands were shaking as they tried to get Buck free._

_The screaming was what finally broke Eddie. He felt a tear streak down his face at how much pain Buck obviously was in and how there was nothing Eddie could do to make it stop. Eddie had promised to have Buck’s back and yet here they were with Eddie not able to do anything. He wanted to wring that little bastard’s neck for doing this to Buck. He heard himself babbling platitudes to Buck but he knew that they didn’t mean anything. They were empty promises._

Eddie’s stomach clenched uncomfortably as he reached up to press the heels of his palms into his eyes to clear that image from his head, but instead it just changed to the night of the party at Bobby and Athena’s.

_He was talking with Karen and keeping an eye on Christopher in the practiced way of every parent when he’d heard Buck coughing as he talked with Bobby. At first it didn’t seem that serious, but then it was getting harsher and even from a distance, Eddie could hear the way Buck’s breathing rattled through his chest._

_His stomach had dropped into his feet at the way Buck had suddenly swayed backwards, not able to catch his breath as he’d tried to ward off Bobby’s concern. Buck had curled in on himself, his hand flying up to cover his mouth and Eddie’s legs had felt unsteady as he’d taken a slight step forward- unsure and hesitant because he didn’t know what was going on._

_When Buck had lifted his head and Eddie saw the first drip of blood, his whole body had reacted so negatively that he’d flinched at how tightly he was holding his shoulders and jaw. None of them had had time to react before Buck was throwing up an entire mouthful of blood and collapsing, but Eddie suddenly felt like the worst friend in the world for being across the yard from Buck at that moment. It was illogical and Eddie knew it, but as Hen and Chim rushed across the yard to where Bobby was kneeling next to Buck and trying to get him to respond, he felt a spike of guilt as he clumsily made his way over to do what he could to help._

The next memory taunted him in a way that somehow hurt even more than the other two had- because it wasn’t just Buck that he’d been worried about, but Christopher as well.

_Buck was covered in scratches and his own blood and he looked so scared to see Eddie the second that Eddie called his name. For a second he just needed to know that Buck was okay, but then his stomach had sank when he realized Christopher wasn’t there. That Buck was wearing Christopher’s glasses around his own neck. “Why do you have his glasses?” Eddie’s voice came out of him and Eddie didn’t recognize the tone there. It was strangely calm and blank. Buck had started to stutter out an explanation and Eddie could feel the pit in his stomach growing._

_“We were at the beach…” Buck said, trying to hard to find the right words._

_Eddie could barely hear what Buck had been trying to say next because Buck was oh so gently taking Christopher’s glasses from around his neck and Eddie could feel the grief already settling into his bones. His son- his little boy- was gone. He couldn’t even be angry with Buck because he could see the same pain that was filling his chest reflected back in Buck’s face. He just felt numb- like his world had narrowed down to the pins and needles feeling that was resonating from his chest and taking over his whole body as he took Christopher’s glasses- so small and fragile just like his son was- from Buck’s shaky hands. He found that he couldn’t look at Chris’s glasses and he couldn’t look at Buck’s face, so he looked over Buck’s shoulder and that’s when he’d spotted Christopher. For a split second he doubted it- he had just heard his son was gone and now he could be seeing things because he was processing- but he **knew** his son and the woman over Buck’s shoulder was holding his son, his baby. “Christopher!”_

_“Dad!” He ran the second he heard his son’s voice calling for him._

_“Oh my God!” He felt tears burning at his eyes and cheeks as he gently took his son from the woman’s arms. The anxiety had threatened to choke him as he brushed a hand over Christopher’s head to make sure there weren’t any obvious injuries. “Oh God. Thank you,” he said and gave the woman the shakiest smile before pressed a protective kiss against Christopher’s forehead and just buried his face in his son’s messy curls._

_“You’re Buck?” She asked and Eddie frowned slightly._

_“No, I’m his father- Eddie.” He looked at Christopher, who was smiling slightly as he held onto Eddie’s uniform shirt just as tightly as Eddie was clutching the hoodie that his son was wrapped up in._

_“He was looking for Buck,” she said and gave him a helpless sort of shrug. Eddie had just pulled Christopher in again and rubbed his son’s back as he tried not to let the panic take over. He’d looked over at Buck just in time to see Buck turn pale- even paler than he had been after the last few days- and collapse into Hen and Bobby’s arms. He’d wanted to go over and help- it was his first knee-jerk reaction- but he had Christopher and he needed to make sure that his son was okay._

Eddie sat up, his breathing shaky as he swung his legs off the side of the bed and hunched over to catch his breath which had suddenly picked up. He knew the signs by now, Frank had talked him through less severe episodes like this when they’d started digging into Eddie’s time in Afghanistan amongst other things, but he didn’t want to wake Buck so he got up and stumbled into bathroom.

His breathing echoed- sounding too loud in the small space- as he sat down heavily and tried to remember Frank’s voice when they’d talked through Eddie’s last panic attack. Five things he could see was what Frank always asked first. His eyes flicked around the room and he tried to pinpoint five specific things. “The toothbrushes,” Eddie’s voice sounded choked and shaky as he started listing things in a whisper. “Buck’s hairgel, the sink, towels, and… and-uh- the bathmat.” Next was four things he could feel. “The floor, the door, my pajama pants,” Eddie said and flexed his fingers from where they were knotted into the soft fabric, “and the air conditioning.” The cool air was blowing right onto him from the vent above his head. It was helping to soothe his rapid heartbeat. “Three things I can hear,” Eddie reminded himself and closed his eyes so he could listen. “My heartbeat,” he said because it was pounding in his ears and he strained to hear over it. “Buck snoring,” he said with a small, breathless laugh. Buck’s congestion had been a little worse since he’d gotten pregnant and so he had a little nasally snore when he was really, deeply asleep. “Traffic.” Because he could hear the soft sound of cars driving down the street despite the late hour. Next was smell, so he had to be able to take a steady breath, he forced himself to focus on his breathing so he could complete the exercise. “Buck’s bodywash.” Buck had taken a shower just before bed, convinced that he still smelled like smoke and that the shower after their shift hadn’t completely washed it out of his hair, so it wasn’t particularly strong but it was there. It was nice. Buck always smelled nice, like something warm and comfortable. “My detergent.” It still clung to his clothes and on many a night when his nightmares had been about Afghanistan it had helped to ground him like it did now. He blew out a breath, his breathing almost completely back to normal as he focused on taste- which was the last thing. “Christopher’s watermelon toothpaste,” Eddie said with a faint chuckle. He and Buck had forgotten to pick up more of their own, so they’d had to brush their teeth with the children’s toothpaste since that was all there was. He took stock of how he felt again and could admit that he felt calmer. There was still so much swimming around in his head still, things that no doubt he would need to bring up to Frank in their next session, but it felt manageable for the moment.

He let his head fall back against the door and let out a slow, even breath.

Eddie nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard a quiet knock on the door. “Eddie?” It was Buck’s voice, sleepy and muffled, coming through the door. “Everything okay?” Eddie stood and he swiped a hand over his face before he opened up the door and gave Buck a weak smile. He wanted to tell Buck that he was fine, but he words just wouldn’t come out. “Come here,” Buck said so softly as he wrapped his arms around Eddie’s shoulders and tugged him in for a tight hug.

“I didn’t mean to wake you up,” Eddie said against Buck’s bare shoulder as he pressed his face against Buck’s skin. Buck just hummed softly and pressed his hand into the small of Eddie’s back. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, Eddie,” Buck said gently and pulled back so he could look at Eddie. “Come on, let’s get back into bed and you can tell me what’s going on.” Buck slipped his hand into Eddie’s and tugged him back into their bed. It was comfortable and it felt safe as Buck tucked the blankets back up around them and turned onto his side to look at Eddie.

Eddie took a while, his jaw working silently as he tried to explain without sounding like he was trying to make Buck feel guilty. Because that wasn’t at all what he wanted. “I’m scared,” Eddie admitted softly, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. “I’m scared of what could happen to you and the baby.”

“Nothing’s going to happen, Eddie,” Buck said softly but Eddie shook his head.

“You can’t know that.” Eddie took a sharp breath in but made sure to let it out slowly. “Our job is dangerous and unpredictable. Every day we ride out on that truck with no idea how things are going to go down.” Eddie turned his head to look at Buck. “I love you, and I know that you love your job. I don’t want you to quit. It’s a huge part of you and I _get_ that. I just want you and this baby,” Eddie said and turned onto his side so he could tenderly brush his thumb over Buck’s middle, “to be okay. And I’m scared that you’re not going to be.”

Buck’s eyes flicked over Eddie’s face for a long moment before he sighed heavily. “I’ve been doing a lot of research,” Buck said softly as he took Eddie’s hand. “I think what will be best will be once I need to slow down, which isn’t for a couple of months yet, I’ll switch to light duty. I can act as the man behind so that I’m still in the station every day and I’m not cooped up in an office doing paperwork.”

“Yeah?” Eddie asked a little roughly. He knew for Buck that this was a huge concession.

“Yeah,” Buck nodded and gave Eddie’s hand a squeeze. “I was so angry at myself for putting myself in this position again that I wasn’t thinking about the _why_. I’m doing this because we’re having a baby which is mind-blowingly amazing. There’s another little person in there that I’ve got to worry about right now because every choice I make- it effects them too.” Eddie just nodded because this was one thing that he felt he couldn’t quite voice his opinion about. He didn’t have to carry the baby- he didn’t know what that was like- so it was hard. Because the baby was still part of him, just in a very different way. “I’ll talk to Bobby tomorrow.” Buck’s voice broke Eddie out of his head, and he nodded again.

“We should get some sleep,” Eddie said and didn’t even want to glance at the clock and see what time it was. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Eddie.” Buck looked like he wanted to say more, like he was biting his tongue, but he just curled into Eddie’s side and wrapped an arm around Eddie’s waist. He dropped off to sleep quickly, his soft snores making a smile pull at Eddie’s mouth, but Eddie still couldn’t quite sleep. He smoothed his hand over Buck’s back for a while until finally he just couldn’t keep his eyes open.

…..

Buck wandered into Bobby’s office and knocked on his open door with a small smile. “You got a minute?” Buck asked and leaned against the doorframe. Bobby nodded and gestured for him to sit down. Buck closed the door behind him and sat with his hands folded in his lap.

“What’s this about?” Bobby asked.

“It’s about my leave,” Buck said chewed his lip. “Once my pregnancy starts to really slow me down, I figured that I should shift to light duty- but I don’t want to ride a desk, Bobby. I want to be here and just be the man behind. I think it’s more than fair and it will keep me here at the station. Eddie and I talked about it last night and I think it will make things easier for everyone.”

“I agree,” Bobby said easily and Buck blinked, having expected Bobby to put up a little bit of a fight. “If you’re here at the station that means all of us can keep an eye on you, something that I’m sure will keep Eddie from driving everyone up the walls with his worrying.” Buck quirked a small smile at that. “Besides, no one wants you to feel like your place is anywhere other than here.” There was an unspoken understanding about what Bobby wasn’t saying about the lawsuit. They’d decided long ago to bury the hatchet and to avoid bringing it up when they could.

Buck nodded. “So, let’s start talking tentative dates,” Buck said and tucked his hands between his knees as Bobby nodded.

…..

It had been a few weeks since Bobby and Buck had talked. Buck still wasn’t even really starting to show, though he’d started to notice a slight softness around his stomach that hadn’t been there before, so he was still allowed to go out on calls with the rest of the team. They’d been called out to a car accident that was blocking one of the exit ramps on the freeway. It had been a difficult extraction, but they’d managed it with a little elbow grease. Buck was shuffling his way back to the truck tiredly alongside Bobby- he was always feeling run down lately but he was sure it was just the baby sapping his energy, he’d read that it was pretty common to feel a little tired- with the saws in his hand when he felt something shift. He suddenly felt cold sweat pricking at the back of his neck and his legs seemed almost to lock up.

“Bobby, can you take these?” Buck asked calmly, his voice sounding almost as if he were underwater. Bobby gave him a funny look before he took the saws out of Buck’s hands. Buck saw Bobby raise an eyebrow and he could see that Bobby’s mouth was moving, but he couldn’t hear Bobby’s voice. He sucked in a shaky breath before his vision whited out.

He came to slowly and he groaned as he clumsily tried to reach up and swipe a hand over his face. His vision, when he tried to open his eyes, spun wildly and he shut his eyes tightly with a muffled groan.

“Buck, can you hear me?” Hen asked from Buck’s side. He took a few steadying breaths before he opened his eyes again.

“Yeah, I’m good,” Buck said and he went to push himself up but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

“Whoa, there Buckaroo,” Chim said and shook his head. “You just passed out cold on call. You remember that?”

“Yeah,” Buck said and he took in his surroundings and grimaced. He was in the back of an ambulance. He slumped back and scowled to himself. “Please tell me that you aren’t taking me to the hospital over a dizzy spell.”

“Buck, you’re pregnant. Fainting like that for no reason that we could find on-scene warrants a hospital visit. Eddie’s already called your OB to meet us at the hospital,” Hen said and gave his shoulder a squeeze.

When they got to the hospital, Hen and Chim gave the doctors all the information that they had before they wheeled him back into the ER. They were just finishing up drawing Buck’s blood when Dr. Carter, her curly hair pulled back into an efficient ponytail, came in. “Evan Buckley, what did I tell you about taking care of yourself?” Her eye-roll was more fond than reprimanding though there was a furrow between her brows. “You want to go ahead and walk me through what happened before you passed out?”

“I was carrying the saws back to the truck and I just started to feel off. I made sure that I passed the saws off as soon as it started,” Buck assured her when her eyes widened. “I broke out in a cold sweat, I couldn’t hear very well, and then my vision whited out and I woke up in the back of an ambulance.”

She nodded thoughtfully and sighed, pushing a stray curl from her face. “I have a sneaking suspicion that it’s probably anemia,” Dr. Carter said with a slight grimace. “Only the bloodwork will confirm it. Have you been having any other symptoms that you can think of?”

Buck shook his head. “Nothing out of the ordinary. A twinge in my hip every now and then, being a little tired, morning sickness.”

“Are you sleeping at night?” She asked with concern etched into her features.

“Probably more than I was before. When I get home from my shifts I just get cleaned up and, depending on the time, go right to sleep.” Buck shrugged.

“Well, sit tight until we get your bloodwork back and we know for sure what’s caused this.” She covered his hand with a warm smile and he just nodded. It wasn’t exactly like he could just get up and leave. His legs were still a little unsteady.

It took longer than Buck wanted, but after a while Dr. Carter and a nurse came back with his results. “Your iron levels are much lower than when we ran your last bloodwork,” she said seriously. “So here’s what we’re going to need to do. We’re going to keep up with the dietary changes that we talked about last time I saw you, but I think we’re going to need to add that supplement in. Then in two weeks you’ll need to come back in and have your blood retested to make sure that we’re doing enough to manage this. Alright?”

“Sounds good,” Buck said and shifted a little.

“Before I’ll sign off on your release, I just want to do quick ultrasound and see how the little one is doing.” Dr. Carter said it with a bright smile on her face but it sent a spike of worry through Buck. He just nodded and they rolled the ultrasound machine in. Buck just tried to focus on his breathing as they pressed the wand to his abdomen and both the technician and Dr. Carter squinted at the screen. “Well, would you look at that.”

Buck whipped his head over to look at the monitor and his heart clenched- but in a good way. The last ultrasound he’d had at six weeks had the baby being little more than a smudge, but the image in the screen now- at ten weeks- looked like a baby. He felt a lump form in his throat, and he couldn’t help but grin a little.

“We could listen to the heartbeat if you wanted to,” the technician offered but Buck shook his head.

“No, I want to wait until Eddie can be here,” Buck said and swiped a hand over his face, glad that he wasn’t bawling his eyes out in front of these two. “But… can I get a print-out of that?”

“Sure thing.” The technician froze a few frames and tapped something out on the keyboard. Before standing and leaving the room. Buck got cleaned up and pulled his shirt back down as Dr. Carter went over the release paperwork with him and they both signed it.

“I think you should take a few days to let your body get it’s footing again, okay?” Dr. Carter said as she signaled for a nearby nurse to come over. “Mr. Buckley is being discharged could you bring a wheelchair.”

“Sure thing,” the nurse said before he went off to find one.

The technician came back with the print-outs, which Buck made sure to tuck into his wallet securely, and then the nurse was wheeling the chair over. “I feel fine,” Buck stated before just getting into the chair.

“Hospital policy. Something you’re more than familiar with by now,” Dr. Carter said and clapped her hand down onto Buck’s shoulder. “I’ll see you in a few weeks for the bloodwork, okay?” Buck nodded and the nurse wheeled him out of the hospital. He was about to pull his phone out of his pocket to call someone- probably Maddie- to come get him but he dind’t get a chance to even unlock his phone before he heard a familiar voice.

“Bobby sent me to come get you,” Athena said and Buck lifted his head to look at her. She had a stern look on her face that made Buck feel a little sheepish. “Come on.”

“I’m sorry, Athena,” Buck said as he followed Athena, dressed in her street clothes so he’d definitely interrupted her day off, to her car. She softened a little and gave him a small smile.

“You’ve nothing to be sorry about, Buck.” She wrapped an arm around Buck’s shoulders and rubbed his back. “You feeling any better?”

“Yeah,” Buck said and rubbed a hand over his face as they separated so that Athena could get into the driver’s side and Buck the passenger’s side. “It’s anemia. I’ve got to get some iron supplements to manage it but once I get my levels up, they said that I should be fine.”

“That’s good. At least it’s something that they can manage,” Athena pointed out as they pulled out of the parking lot and headed back to the station. Buck was sure that Bobby would keep him behind for part of the shift just to make sure that he was okay, but once the initial shock of worry had passed, everyone would relax.

“Yeah,” Buck said and tucked his hands underneath his thighs- a nervous habit he’d picked up from Eddie. They lapsed into a slightly uncomfortable silence.

“I can hear you thinking from over here. What’s going on in that head of yours, Buckaroo?” Athena glanced over at him before turning her attention back to the road as they stopped at a light.

“It’s going to sound so stupid,” Buck said as he reached into his wallet and pulled out one of the ultrasounds. “I got another ultrasound- they just wanted to check in with the baby and make sure everything was okay- and it just hit me how real this is.” He swiped his thumb over the clear outline of the baby’s head.

Athena let out a soft laugh as they started moving again. “I think everyone having a baby has a moment like that. I know I did when I was pregnant with May and Harry. Just wait until you feel the baby move for the first time. That’ll throw you for a loop for sure.” Buck let out a laugh and nodded as he carefully put the picture back into his wallet.

They pulled into the station and Athena settled her hand over Buck’s knee. “Thanks, Athena. I really mean it,” Buck said and gave her a small smile. “You and Bobby are the closest thing that I really have to parents and… I don’t know how to thank you enough.”

Athena blinked at him, clearly taken aback at Buck’s words if the wetness in her eyes was anything to go by, before swatting at his leg. “You can get back to work doing what you do best. How about that?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Buck laughed and opened up the car door so he could step out. He made his way back into the station and he was barely in the door before he was being pulled into a tight hug by a practically vibrating Eddie. “Hey,” Buck said soothingly and cradled the back of Eddie’s head with one hand while he rubbed soothing circles into Eddie’s back with the other. “I’m okay.”

“You scared the shit out of me, Buck,” Eddie mumbled against Buck’s neck before pulling back just enough to kiss him hard on the mouth.

“I’m fine,” Buck said and brushed his nose against Eddie’s when they parted. “Doctors ran some tests and said it was low-iron anemia. They’re putting me on some supplements and that should take care of the dizziness. No more passing out.”

Eddie let out a harsh breath and Buck kissed him again for reassurance. “You’re gonna give me an ulcer,” Eddie muttered and shook his head. Buck shot him a grin and pulled away.

“I got you something that might make up for it,” Buck said and pulled the ultrasound from his wallet. He held it out to Eddie and Eddie took it carefully, the same awe in his face as when had handed him the first one.

“Everything okay?” Bobby’s face was obviously concerned so Buck sent the captain a reassuring smile.

“Anemia. Going to take some iron supplements, take a couple of shifts off if it can be managed-”

“Of course it can,” Bobby said immediately and Buck ducked his head at the protective edge to Bobby’s voice. He didn’t want to be whoever tried to say no when Bobby called them to switch shifts.

“Then the doctors said that all the symptoms should go away.” Buck tucked his hands into his pockets. Bobby eyed him for a long moment before nodding, his shoulders relaxing a little from where they’d been squared- almost as if Bobby had been bracing for impact.

“What’s that?” Bobby asked and stepped up behind Eddie so he could take a look. Eddie handed it over with the proudest smile that he usually reserved for Parent’s Day at Christopher’s school.

“They took an ultrasound,” Buck said and rubbed the back of his neck. Bobby’s face softened and there was a touch of sadness there too that made Buck’s chest ache. Bobby handed it back to Eddie and he had a smile on his face but Buck could see that there were other emotions mingling in Bobby’s eyes.

“Alright. Well, you can finish your shift as man behind today-” Buck couldn’t help but chuckle at how predictable Bobby could be sometimes “and then I’ll work it out so that your shifts will be covered for the next couple of days.”

“Thanks, Bobby,” Buck said sincerely and gave Bobby an easy smile.

Bobby clapped a hand onto Buck’s shoulder before giving Eddie a playful shove. “Come on then. Lunch isn’t going to fix itself. Eddie, finish up with the truck. I want it spotless. Buck, help me out in the kitchen.”

“Love to, Cap,” Buck said and shot Eddie a wink as the other frowned at the truck in question. “Have fun, babe.” Buck pressed a smacking kiss to Eddie’s cheek.

“Teacher’s pet,” Eddie muttered and swatted at Buck’s ass as Buck darted away expertly, having expected the playful swing.

“It’s not Buck’s fault that you can burn water, Eddie,” Bobby pointed out with a wry grin. Eddie’s affronted face had Buck and Bobby both laughing as they made their way up into the loft.

**Author's Note:**

> This covered quite a bit of area and oh boy we aren't done yet! There was a request for protective Eddie and Bobby and while this certainly isn't the end of it, here's a little glimpse into it. Comments are so cherished and inspire me to write more so definitely send me ideas for this -verse if you have any!  
> -James


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